Many of us conflate forgiveness with reconciliation because we desire greatly to forgo the process of repentance. But see let me put you up on game: Forgiveness is for the offend-ED, while repentance? Well. Repentance is for the offend—ER.
See the word of God says that while we were yet sinners, Christ came to save us. What that means is the forgiveness has already been extended—AS I SAY EVERYDAY: Jesus is for EVERYBODY. Reconciliation though? That comes from repentance. And we don’t like that because it requires us to be accountable for our wrongndoing, to acknowledge and then STOP DOING the thing and being the person who created the breach in trust and relationship.
And while He has forgiven that offense in Christ, Unfortunately sin nature still offends God. Therefore we are still required to account for and crucify this will of ours that is the lust of the flesh, unnatural desires, and the unyieldingly stiff neck of pride.
As He is in the world so we are to be! Which means we are required to extend forgiveness without measure. And, we are also held to the standard of holding people accountable to repentance before reconciliation. To do less is to give the inaccurate impression that we can do what we want, say what we want, treat others how we want—but still reap the benefit. This mindset is contrary to the very principles of The Kingdom of seed time and harvest, of reaping what we have sown. The forgiveness we sow breeds mercy that endures as we transgress ourselves; and the repentance we sow gives way to harvests of reconciliation in ways we never thought available.
So. Remember this one thing: if you want reconciliation, restoration of that which you’ve lost because of your sin? Acknowledge the sin. Repent fully and joyfully and MEAN IT. God requires a pure heart and clean hands…and one never exists without the other.